When I was little I LOVED CORN NUTS. Oh lordy did I love ‘em. I could gorge myself on a bulk bag of Corn Nuts until my head exploded.

But then one day, my evil older brother tried to ruin the beautiful relationship that Corn Nuts and I had built. He told me that if I ate Corn Nuts and then immediately drank water, I would sprout corn plants from my ears. Fucker. I mean Corn Nuts LOOK like the corn seeds my dad planted in the back yard every year and waters with care. It seem, well, plausible enough.

Now, of course, it seems ridiculous. Insane. Totally er, nuts. To think that by just EATING something its genetic material could somehow fuse with mine and produce unexpected Frankenstieanian side effects. I mean seriously.

It seems that Greenpeace has never emerged from their own childhood horror story. For the past forever, they have been campaigning against all kinds of genetically modified foods. As a result of their work, GM foods must be labeled as such on the package. Which is good, so long as the consuming public really understands what there is to fear. Now Greenpeace is zeroing in on livestock fed GM feed crops, as they are not required to be labeled as such under EU regulations.  In fact, the organization submitted a one million strong petition to the EU to change this status quo just a couple weeks ago.

And I guess, well, more upfront labeling is never really a bad thing. But the suggestion implies that merely by eating GM products we, or the livestock, become GM. And you know, it just ain’t so. Just like eating some Corn Nuts won’t turn me corny (har), eating a GM food product will not make you genetically modified. You’ve eat TONNES already, believe me you.

Of course this is nothing new; worries over the movement of transgenes has plagued GM feed for ages. Back in 2000, critics suggested that transgenes could pass from feed to animal via gut bacteria. But after donkeys years, officials have never found trace of this occurrence. Indeed a recent report from the EU found that animals fed GM feed crops had no traces of the DNA or proteins in their meat or eggs or other foody bits.

I am not one to pretend that the big biotech companies are good or kind or invested in the health and well being of anyone beyond their shareholders (I mean Monsanto is now equivalent with PURE EVIL in my head). And, like many a reasonable folk, I have concerns over the environmental impact of growing GMOs. However, the admission, banning or labeling of GM-fed animals should not propagate mis-information about the safety concerns of this *potentially useful, environmentally friendly, plentiful, happy and healthy food.

*"With great power comes great responsibility,” says Spiderman’s aunt. Let’s just say I don’t want Monsanto to save my world.

“Big people small people, matter of fact, all people, everybody makes mistakes oh yes they doooooo.” (click on lyrics to watch!)

That’s what Big Bird sang on my favorite Sesame Street album. And it came to mind when I read about the bioweapons boo boos that are rife inUniversity biodefense labs nationwide. The Sunshine Project outs some of them - that is from the biosafety level three labs that are forthcoming and open about admitting their mistakes. So, they warn, the incidents they’ve dug up are probably a conservative estimate of how often this happens.

Here’s a laundry list of their mistakes. Errors include researchers jabbing themselves with biological agent infected needles: there’s one anthrax needle, one unidentified pathogen needle, and another that was either plague or anthrax. There are a couple other incidents that include unauthorized research and alarms not sounding when exhaust fans failed.

The Sunshine Project is unflinching in its censure:

What is needed, according to the Sunshine Project, is to reduce the number of facilities and people handing bioweapons agents in the United States and to bring the fragmented and frequently unenforced hodgepodge of federal biolab rules and suggestions together into a unified, mandatory, and enforced system that ensures laboratory safety and public accountability

And this is coming from the same non-profit organization that dug up enough dirt on the University of Texas’ bioweapons lab practices that the CDC had to shut down their work on bioweapons.

I could argue, yes I could, that the singing talents of one very soulful Basenji pupper are science related; it speaks to the evolution of communication, sensory systems and social bonding. Not to mention the physiology that allows such amazing sounds to come from such wee dog. Watch it. I mean it. Anne and I were crying. (via Dooce).

So I just gave you some links to some rocking oldies. Now it’s time to introduce Les Horribles Cernettes, who were around long before the piping hot Pipettes were even learning what a pipette does.

The Cernettes are, as you clever souls guessed it, from CERN and they boast that they’re the only “High Energy Rock Band” around. I’d believe them. I mean, they’ve got a song called “My Sweetheart is a Nobel Prize” (listen here); what further proof do you need??

Now one of the Cernette’s other claims to fame is that they were the first band to have a web page and band picture posted on the web (I’m assuming the one above) online. And again, I’d believe it. After all, the world wide web was created at CERN back in 1989. And the Cernettes webpage was born in 1992. Those are pretty early internet days.

Anyways, like most things that shone bright in the early nineties they’ve staged a come back at this year’s CERN Hardronic festival no less. Read about their first show in six years in the Compact Muon Solenoid Times. The last standing Cernettes are Michele de Gennaro, a 3-D graphic artist at CERN, Anne MacNabb and Vicky Corlass (who’s jobs I couldn’t find right away. But I’m on it).

A while back, I signed up to receive the Health Hazard Alert emails from the Canadian Food Inspection Agency. They alert consumers to specific food products that have things in them, say NUTS, that shouldn’t be there. Of course I was in the deal for the nutty notification (though I would later learn that in most cases of mislabeled nuts there is a mix up of nut types and because I am allergic to ALL OF THEM, it’s never really helped. Plus everything says it has traces of nuts anyways, but that’s another story).

Annnnways. I have to say that these emails are pretty funny. You know, in a scary-funny way. Today I got three emails; one about paralytic shellfish toxin (its slightly less alarming and better known name is red tide) in New Brunswick softshell clams; another was about Botulism toxin in some No Name canned French beans and finally Salmonella in bags of sesame seeds sold around Alberta and in London, Ontario. Good to know, eh?

The only time I was really terrified, however, was about a month back on June 28th when I saw in my Inbox the announcement of the recall of Robert’s American Gourmet Veggie Booty snack food, which had seemingly been tainted with Salmonella. And yes (yes!) I had just eaten an entire bag of the stuff (or maybe two who’s counting? I am addicted).

Obviously, I wasn’t dead or sick or vomiting out my ears, so all was okay. But, see, Veggie Booty - which is like puffed corn, rice, soy all covered with delicious salty veggie powder and has a strange aftertaste of, well nothing - costs about 4$ at my local store. Which for some spinach powered corn pops is a bit much. So all I could think was, how much will it cost to feed my addiction now?

Do you have a fancy schmancy mobile phone? Beware! You could be making your computer jealous. And when computers get jealous, they attack! So says the Jealous Computers site, a new viral marketing ad site from Nokia. I had a hunt around on the net to see what people were saying about it, and a few of them think it’s a rather poor effort, but personally, I think it’s quite funny. The safety tips page is the best bit, offering a trademarked Disguise Mug that hides your phone from your computer. Even if the reason you can’t buy one (too many computer attacks at the factory) is a tiny bit hokey. You can however download the camouflage ringtone or safety poster should you feel the need. And, if you’ve got significantly too much time on your hands, you can even upload your very own ’Victims testify‘ videos or pictures.

Every now and then I’m completely blown over by something I come across on the web and it’s so distracting and delightful I hardly do anything else than wade in its glory. Well, that’s precisley what I did when I came across the mp3s of Singing Science Records.

These songs are real deal people. Fantastic jaunty 1960s jingles about science. Songs so catchy and springy that they stay on repeat in your head for days at a time.

Zoom A Little Zoom is awfully good. And It’s A Scientific Fact is gold. Those are just some titles from the LP Space Songs. But then there’s Energy & Motion Songs, Experiment Songs, Weather Songs, Nature Songs, and More Nature Songs.

So go. Download them all. Load them up in iTunes and learn something. It’s way more fun when there’s a swinging beat involved. 

If you worked in an office only a few hundred metres from a motorway, you would probably be tempted to seal the windows to keep out the nasty noxious fumes, fire up the aircon, and get on with your daily business in your clean fresh indoor environment. But what would you do if you found that the laser printer humming away at the desk next to yours was in fact pouring out more evil air than the traffic outside? Heave open the nearest window and throw the laser printer out of it? Yes, me too.

DOGS AND THEIR BALLS: BFF THANKS TO CANINE BIRTH CONTROL BREAKTHROUGH (PHOTO: CHRIS JOHNSON)

When I got my black and tan hound fixed back in Texas years back the neighbourhood kids started calling him Lamont (which was his name) “flat nuts” (which wasn’t). To be fair it was an accurate nickname. My dog did have flat nuts and I felt awful bad about it. But now there’s an alternative to castration. Canines can get birth control implants instead of going under the knife to tame their inner beast. The contraceptive implant should gain approval in Europe within weeks. If only there was a human version in the pipelines.

In the meantime, if your dog has flat nuts and you feel bad, perhaps you should consider Neuticles, testicular implants for pets. Their website boasts that with Neuticles “it’s like nothing ever changed!” And so far the odd 250,000 owners whose pets carry the kidney bean shaped implants would have to agree.

If you don’t have a flat-nutted dog but want to join in the fun, you can always get some of their merchandise. How about a Neuticle necklace? Yours for only $39! 

Yesterday a study was published in the New England Journal of Medicine all about how our social networks seem to influence whether we become obese - or lose weight (free full text if you want it). It was an opportunistic study that used the data from the 12,000 people in the long term Framingham Heart Study in Massachusetts. For this particular analysis, they used 32 years worth of data.

By analyzing the BMIs of friends and family over time (who were given as emergeny or information contacts in the original questionnaires), the team found that people who gain weight seem to drag their friends with them.

My first reaction was, well OF COURSE that makes sense. Obesity, while containing a large genetic quotient, tends to be about lifestyle choices. Lifestyle choices tend to be shared by social circles; social circles tend to be in the same geographic or socio-economic neighborhood, which is also a predictor of obesity...and badda bing badda boom! A bunch of fat friends.

My interest was actually piqued upon reading the New York Times this morning, and finding they had a discussion board about the story they ran on the study yesterday.

The discussion board is TERRIFYING. I’ve read most of the comments; I COULD NOT PULL MY EYES AWAY. There certainly are a lot of people in America who are angry about obesity - either because they themselves feel attacked, stigmatized and blamed for their weight OR because they just want obese people to quit eating Ho-Hos and go for a walk already. In fact, many of commenters criticized the study because it was just so OBVIOUS, that it couldn’t possibly be, like a REAL cause of obesity or whatever. There were few level heads to go around.

A large portion of writers were angry about this study because they found it to be, yet again, more blame, another reason to steer clear of fat people and rightfully mock them. One person said they felt like they might wake up tomorrow and have less friends. Others attacked the study as pseudo-science, anecdotal bullshit, STOOPID (sic). One man even demanded that the lead author pay back the money he received to conduct the study.

Most seemed particularly angered by the use of the word “contagious”. And I agree, it might not have been the most prudent choice of words from the NYTimes. And suggesting you ditch your fat friends is, urm, kind of mean. But what is shocking about the scaling up smaller social experiments on eating habits to a longitudinal, epidemiological approach?

I mean:

1) This study from 2006 found that people eat more when they are in the company of their friends, not strangers or alone.
2) Or take this 1994 study, which found that family dinners are larger than solitary meals, and friend-social dinners are larger and of longer duration than solitary meals; and longer duration meals = more food intake.
3) Meals size increases by a power function to the number of co-eaters and we can eat up to 75% more with lots of friends or family compared to when we are alone.

It’s not to say that fat is contagious, but social forces are obviously HUGELY powerful determinates of how much we eat, when and where. And just as important a part of understanding the rise in obesity as genetics, food availability, portion sizes, the shift to more sedentary jobs, cars and suburbs. And lambasting a study because it made you FEEL BAD, is not appropriate criticism.