For Those About to Hypothesize: We Salute You

The right songs at the right times let you jog faster, feel happier, or wallow in your own personal pit of despair until you feel like emerging. Might such tunes give researchers toiling at the microscope, Petri dish or pipette that extra little bit of auditory inspiration to get through endless days at the lab bench?

It’s worth a try, and like a bee dancing to direct the hive to honey, Inkling is here to guide you to some sweet options with our Top Ten Songs about Science. May your research reap the rewards. Or just your ears. In reverse order:

10. What We Need More of Is Science by MC HAWKING

Web-developer-turned-gangsta-rapper MC Hawking delivers the pro-science, anti-fundamentalist lyrics on his album “A Brief History of Rhyme” in computerized voice – as though from physicist Stephen Hawking himself. The song “What We Need More of Is Science” rails against “the pseudo-science of quacks, morons and fools” and acts as a rallying cry for science education and reason over creationism: “But maybe there is still hope for the young / if they reject the dung being slung from the tongues / of the ignorant fools who call themselves preachers / and listen instead to their science teachers.” The song manages to parody a scientist while delivering a passionate message. Clever work, MC.

The rest of the album vacillates between gangsta: “15 bullets in my clip, my hand rests heavy on my pistol grip” (from the song “E = MC Hawking”), and hard-core science: “Creationists always try to use the second law [of thermodynamics] to disprove evolution, but their theory has a flaw: the second law is quite precise about where it applies, only in a closed system must the entropy count rise” (from “Entropy”). A warning to polite pipetters: explicit lyrics run amok in this album.

9. The Planets by GUSTAV HOLST

This 1916 orchestral suite by Gustav Holst contains seven movements, each an ode to a different planet. We learn that Jupiter is jolly and Mars, with rapid staccato beats evoking a marching army, wants to go to war. The piece is more about astrology than astronomy, with the attitude of each planet recalling the Roman god for which it was named. But even this literary interpretation of space exploration will attract science enthusiasts. While listening to the beautiful, calm tones of “Venus, the Bringer of Peace,” I pondered how space probes might enhance our understanding of the carbon dioxide-heavy atmosphere of Venus. Incidentally, the discovery of Pluto in 1930 occurred during Holst’s lifetime. He did not add a movement for the last planet (another composer was later commissioned to do so) – perhaps a brilliant piece of foresight on his part, considering that the International Astronomical Union demoted Pluto last year.

8 & 7. She Blinded me with Science by THOMAS DOLBY 
and Chemistry by SEMISONIC

In the Dirty Science category we have these two smutty tunes. Why lumped together? Well, they deserve it. In fact, they probably like it. The titles may create the illusion of innocent, educational music, but listen again, my friend. From Dolby: “It’s poetry in motion / she turned her tender eyes to me / as deep as any ocean / as sweet as any harmony / she blinded me with science.” And Semisonic: “For a while we conducted experiments / in an apartment by the River Road / and we found out that the two things we put together / had a bad tendency to explode.” Frankly, I’m concerned about Semisonic’s wholesale disregard for laboratory safety, but perhaps they’re not talking about how to make a one-molar solution of sodium hydroxide.

6. I Am the Atom Bomb by THE BON SAVANTS 

The Bon Savants’ smooth and straightforward mention of the Schrödinger function in the first line of this melodic pop song earns them a secure spot on Inkling’s top ten. Written from the point of view of its titular scientific invention, the lyrics declare, “I am the atom bomb / I’ll bring death and destruction / from the Schrödinger function.” In case you wanted to know, German scientist Erwin Schrödinger developed his eponymous function to help describe the energy of atoms having only one electron. The indie band’s name means “good scientists” in French, and they count an MIT rocket scientist among their members. What more do you need?

5. The Horizon Has Been Defeated by JACK JOHNSON  

Rather than simply mentioning science, this laid-back melody philosophizes on the wisdom (or lack of) in our über-interest in technology. “No prints can come from fingers / if machines become our hands / And then our feet become the wheels / and then the wheels become the cars / and then the rigs begin to drill / until the drilling goes too far.” Before you brush off this bleak prognostication, remember, there’s the Segway and $70-a-barrel oil. They may call us Luddites, Jack, but now I’m scared, too.

4. Countdown by RUSH

Now, now, before we get too down on progress, Rush uplifts our faith in technology with an elevating account of a space shuttle launch. True, they may build the drama a little too high with background sounds of walkie-talkie chatter and stanzas such as “This magic day when super-science / Mingles with the bright stuff of dreams.” Personally, I’ve never seen a shuttle launch, so who am I to argue with, “Scorching blast of golden fire / as it slowly leaves the ground / tears away with a mighty force / the air is shattered by the awesome sound.” In an age when the world no longer stops to watch these feats of science, I’m glad these Canadian rockers took the time to remind us of what makes a shuttle launch marvelous.

3. Speed of Sound by COLDPLAY   

This ethereal, flowing tune possesses a highly promising title, though it woefully misinforms fans on some important values in the world of math and physics. We begin to see Coldplay’s errant scientific lyricism with, “I look up at night / the planets are moving at the speed of light.” Sadly, Chris Martin, the fastest of the planets, Mercury, moves at 47,900 meters per second, while the speed of light is a smidge faster, at 299,792,458 m/s. The song also states, “Birds go flying at the speed of sound.” Wishful thinking, again, Coldplay. The fastest known bird, widely believed to be the peregrine falcon, parts the air at about 185 miles per hour in a dive (compared to sound’s ripping 769 mph). But if no genius astrophysicists or ornithologists emerge from the next generation of America’s youth, will I blame Coldplay? With notes so sweet and a tune so catchy, I suppose not.

2. Mammal by THEY MIGHT BE GIANTS   

This playful yet informative song not only manages to name obscure mammals (echidna, monotremes), but also ventures deeper into scientific territory with detailed mention of the mammals’, “four chambered heart” and “very high metabolic rate.” Even while educating, They Might Be Giants maintains cuteness (“they raise a paw”). Maybe it’s narcissism, but I’m in love.

1. Sounds of Science by BEASTIE BOYS

A true classic and class act, the Beastie Boys’ seamless rhyming and eclectic subject matter find fertile ground in the field of science. The scientist-luminary name-dropping ranges from Isaac Newton to Ben Franklin, and explorer Ponce de León and his search for the fountain of youth even get in on the action. Beyond that, their scientific method wanes, but they do add “I got science for any occasion / postulating theorems formulating equations.” I’ll take them at their word. And if that’s not enough to convince you to keep them on your list, they advise on matters of style as well: “Rock my Adidas, never rock Filas.”

As scientists the world over toil tirelessly, we – and they – can revel in the grooves inspired by their work. Like the wave-particle duality of light, sometimes these beats behave like science, sometimes like music. Either way, perhaps they can enlighten and brighten the future of scientific research, inspiring earth-shattering breakthroughs in laboratories the world over. Well, probably not, but at least they get us through the day in an entertaining way.